Meet The Nat Pack!

My photo
The Nat Pack: The super fashionable, super mod, super hip family consisting of Nat, Pete, Jakob, Brock, Troy, and Ivy. Like The Rat Pack, only younger, cuter, and not as rich or famous.

Sunday, October 18, 2009

Drug-Induced Musings

You know how there are some musicians that take drugs and totally make their best music when high? Well, you're not going to get any genius from me while I'm on pain meds; I mostly just lose my short-term memory and repeat myself a lot and watch the room spin around. Which can be fun, too, I guess. I was going to make this super clever post about my awesome surgery, but the more I think of it in my swooshing head the more it's just not super clever. But I still want to type, so you get a mediocre version of my super witty post. Lucky you! (See? And I said "super" at least three times in the last two sentences. Yay, short term memory!)

First, I realized that I should have explained my surgery; I just kind of threw the news out there. I had what is called uterine prolapse, where the ligaments that typically hold the uterus in place and upright kind of gave up, which was giving me a lot of back pain; the solution was to get a complete hysterectomy. Despite some nausea afterwards, the surgery went well, and hopefully I'll be getting back to normal soon. I can't do any lifting or stretching for about a month, which means no housework like sweeping or vacuuming or laundry. So it's like a vacation. A pretty sucky vacation, but a break of sorts nevertheless.

The anesthesiologist that came in the first time (I saw about three or four of those guys, but I'd better only get charged for one of 'em) was like the McDreamy of my hospital; I swear when he smiled he that little star-thingy (*) by his teeth and it went ping! All of the nurses and doctors were really nice, especially since my surgery got pushed back because of an emergency C-section my doctor had to perform.

They had this thing called Bair Paws; the dressing gown had little tubey things in it, and a tube of warm air connected to it, and it fills the gown with warm air. Oooooh, so nice. I'm going to try to link to a pic of it right here. I've also had these anti-embolism stockings, which have kept my post-surgery cankles in check, and keeps the circulation a-flowing, so my feet are actually warm, and helps with the blood clot chances. Added bonuses there! Oh, and the best part: they had these leg brace looking things, and they alternately fill with air and squeeze your legs a little bit, then let go. Again, for the clotting reason, but it was like a 24-hour leg massage. Me likey. A lot.

I totally stayed up until 2 a.m. Monday night making bags for YW in Excellence, along with hemming these colored cloth things. I did a really crappy job. It was like drunk dialing, but for seamstresses. I don't think I could have done a better job with my current drugged state as I did that night. Which tells you how great of a seamstress I am.

When we were checking in at the hospital, they asked if we wanted to pay upfront. I asked if we could get a discount if we did pay now. We got 20% off. There are a lot of couponers out there that would be so proud of us.

Um, that's all I can think of right now. Maybe when I'm a bit more sober/lucid/coherent I'll come up with something more.

15 comments:

megan said...

I'm glad the surgery went well! Sorry you had to go through it! It would be nice to have a vacation from cleaning and laundry for a month...although, I usually don't clean much anyway. Hehe. Get feeling better!! I'm almost done with your pictures so I'll call you later today when I post them:)

Aprillium said...

Glad everything went smoothly. Surgery sucks! Hope you recover quickly and if your laundry gets into the state of having no underwear give me a call, I'll come over and help out where I can. :)

Becky said...

Love you!

Rachel said...

Until we were asked to bring over a meal, I didn't know what was going on! That's a big deal for a little lady! I hope your recovery goes wonderfully

jomama said...

i'm glad your surgery went well. you put such a positive spin on everything, it's inspirational. hope you continue to recover quickly and that everything is ok with you.

Karlenn said...

Well, Nat, your house looked pretty awesome today when I came over; Pete is doing a good job. Dude, so that food I brought over was GROSS. It smelled so good when I was cooking it, but not so good in real life. Sorry about that. :( I should always do tried-and-true recipes when I take food to people.

Jenny said...

hope you'll be feeling better soon!

CHELZERS said...

Wow! I'm sorry you had all that happen to you! :( But your post was clever---as always! I especially liked the "drunk dialing, but for seamstresses" part.
Totally laughing.
Recover quickly! {{{{HUGS}}}}

Jodi said...

Ha ha ha! I have been waiting and hoping for a druged post. I knew it would not disappoint. Very funny!!! I periodically check out my window to check for the white flag waving out the door or any signs of distress. Pete assured me that all was well yesterday along with his two buddies sitting quietly along side him as he taught Sunday school. I am feeling good, so let me know what you are dreaming of as your room spins around.

Super Mom said...

Glad that you made it through okay. Good luck being a mom who is restricted in her activities. I wish we were closer to be able to come and help. Way to work the hospital for a deal- you are always thinking!

Mindy H. said...

I am so glad that everything went ok. Your drug-induced musings were every bit as hilarious as your stone-cold sober posts, so we know that your sense of humor survived the surgery intact. It sounds like your family is doing a good job taking care of you. Take it easy and feel well soon!

Ulberich said...

Hope you are having a good recovery! Wow-I loved how you were so positive about the surgery-I hate hospitals overall! Enjoy your "vacation"!

Blaire said...

Feel better soon!!!

Robin said...

Hope you're feeling better. Let me know if you need help with kids when the husband/Mom help runs out. I'm almost always home anyway and I truly would not mind an extra or two (or three).

Maggi said...

Hiyya, Nat! Sorry to learn of your surgery, the pain you endured, and your drug-induced semi-coma. I had to have the same surgery only for fibroids and uncontrollable bleeding. I must say, after you heal of course, it is VERY liberating not to have to worry about inconvenient periods (they always used to happen the week we went on vacation) or an oopsie pregnancy. The week after mine, we went to Guatemala and other central American countries/locations to hike around the pyramids. I had to wear stretch waistband pants (oh, how fashionable NOT!) so as not to put any pressure on my abdomen. Hope your recovery is swift!
Hugs and Kisses